Unrequited Love: 5 Steps To Deal With It

Author: Louis Cruz, June 7th, 2010

To love someone and not have that love reciprocated is definitely a difficult experience. There is no desire at all from the other person to reciprocate your love. Maybe you have found this out by direct communication or a demonstration of his or her lack of interest in you. It doesn’t really matter how you were able to find out about the person’s lack of interest. But its of extreme importance that you have methods to eliminate totally these feelings of love. The destructive effects that this love may have on you can last for years. You may not only develop problems of an emotional nature but even physical damage can take place if these emotions are not coped with correctly. I will now share with you the five steps that will get you in to the road of recovery from emotions of unrequited love.

Write Down Your Feelings

Please, not with the person you have feelings for. You have probably done this already since the other person may have expressed their lack of love towards you. It is good to have a close and trustworthy person to express your feelings. But if you do not desire to do this or do not want anyone to know, you can just write your feelings in paper. This is a good way to express your emotions and frustrations. This is a great “letting go” technique since it helps you let out your bottled up emotions as if you were talking to someone. Some recommendations when following this step:
1. You should be in a quiet place without disturbance
2. Do not be afraid of crying while you write

Maintain an Open Mind

You really do not know if that person you love may have a change of heart. Now I am not telling you this so that you can start getting your hopes up. No. The other person may actually continue to be unresponsive to your love. The correct thing to do is to maintain a neutral attitude. Do not create “what if” scenarios in your head. Do not plan. Even though you need to be ready for both situations since either scenarios are possible. You should not plan. Let time take its course.

Start Dating New People

The best thing to do is to start meeting new friends. I know your heart is somewhere else but this may actually help for different reasons. First, your mind will be occupied and second, you will be able to analyze the real intensity of your love. Is this love that you feel really as strong as you thought it was? Does being with someone else lessen your feelings? Believe it or not, it is hard to understand your own heart sometimes. This step may help you understand yourself better. Of course, make sure this is just a casual date and not something to get in to a serious relationship. This date should only be a friendship type of a date.

Get Ready For a Blind Date

A blind date can be an exciting adventure. This is highly recommended for those who find it difficult to recover from an unrequited love. This is not intended to find the love of your life. But will definitely take your mind off the one who does not want you. Again this blind date should be a fun occasion and not taken as a serious relationship kind of thing.

Do Some More Writing

Writing? Not again! Well I am sorry but there is another technique that involves writing. You should create a list of the things you would like in a real loving relationship. After you have done this list you should compare it with the person you love. You may be surprised to find out that this person does not really offer you what you are looking for in a lifelong mate.

It may hurt to speak and even think of an unrequited love. But you must. It is important that you open up and get these feelings out. Analyze your situation and be determined to conquer these feelings. Keep an open mind. Continue to follow the steps mentioned above. Continue to meet people. When dealing with unrequited love you need to do everything possible to ensure that you get over these strong emotions forever. You are worth it. Do not feel inferior or undeserving. You are unique and there is a special person, the right person waiting for you just around the corner.

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Categories: Relationships Tags: Relationships, unrequited love, unreturned love